WASHINGTON, DC — The phrase “Burn the whole f***ing country down” is being considered vital by the Biden administration to sum up America under his leadership. So leading Democrats are hoping that focus groups will respond favorably to the phrase. CNN’s Don Lemon recently suggested the only rational and responsible path for the Democrats is…

VANCOUVER, WA–Historians from the University of Portland have uncovered an original hand sanitizer bottle that belonged to the famously risk-averse duo, Lewis and Clark. Facemasks, rape whistles, and even the skeleton of a small emotional support dog were also discovered along the Columbia River banks. “Back then you were allowed to take off your mask…

Last week, AOC reminded us that when a more powerful and dominating conservative challenges her wisdom, it’s simply because he wants to date her. Did you know this sort of thing also happens in the wild? Let’s take a look at some photos showing the more capable predator trying to date the weak: 10. This…

New documents from the NIH reveal that once Dr. Anthony Fauci realized he had no idea how to kill COVID, he tried his hand at killing puppies. Soon the phrase #FauciKillsDoggieStyle began trending on Twitter and the wise and noble doctor was forced to defend himself. “Listen, I’m a warm and relatable man. Therefore, I understand that…

With a loud booming voice that oddly sounded like it was coming from DNC headquarters, Science™ spoke and said it’s time to triple mask and limit home gatherings to 500 people. But Science™ accidentally made the rookie mistake by not first running its findings by Obama’s party planning committee. “You tell Science™ it needs to reschedule. Before…