‘Bring Me This Genius,’ Biden Whispers To Staff While Watching Elf

‘Bring Me This Genius,’ Biden Whispers To Staff While Watching Elf

WASHINGTON, DC — Thinking he was watching CNN, Joe Biden found himself watching the 2003 Christmas classic Elf.  The fictional president instantly became enamored with the movie’s star, Buddy the Elf.     “Jean-Pierre! Come quick!  CNN’s done it again!  They’ve found perhaps the world’s most distinguished statesman,” he yelled to his press secretary.  As they…

Jennifer Lawerence To Reboot ‘Hunger Games’ Where Katniss Just Does Whatever The Capitol Wants

Jennifer Lawerence To Reboot ‘Hunger Games’ Where Katniss Just Does Whatever The Capitol Wants

HOLLYWOOD, CA – It was a busy week for Hollywood’s Jennifer Lawerence. There was the normal conjugal visit with Harvey Weinstein. Then, she found time to endorse special-needs candidate Kamala Harris. Now, filming begins on the new Hunger Games movie.  This time, Katniss will just do whatever the Capitol wants. The title is Hunger Games:…