In a rather odd way, fictional President Joe Biden laid out a generous jobs program for lawyers Thursday night. “Listen here, fat. In the coming days, I’m gonna put y’all back in chains. Got it?” Biden said in an effort to get the attention of the legal community. Then, to make it crystal clear he was attempting…
Category: Law
Doctor Who Told Patients To Eat ‘An Apple A Day’ Charged With Prescribing Horse Food
Dawsonville, GA– Our pandemic was going so great. But it looks like a hotshot doctor in northern Georgia may have ruined everything. Dr. Jessi Roberts, a straight white male, was caught suggesting his patients eat horse food ‘every day’ for over twelve years. Even more disgusting, he made up a little rhyme to help his victims…
Roe v. Wade Overturned, Gay Men Hit Hardest
The homosexual community was just healing from the trauma of bankrupting bakers, and now this? The Supreme Court, a government body infamous for not being gay despite repeated warnings, abolished abortion this week. An aggressive attack that disproportionately targets the homosexual men of Texas. “Their agenda against us is so blatant,” Dallas’ Josh McGayhee fumed. “The Supreme Court should have just…
All Charges Dropped For January 6th Rioters On The Grounds It Was 'Four Or Five Days Ago'
We all share the painful memory of DC Police waving Trump supporters into the Capitol building like a third-base coach on January 6th. But Joe Biden, our wise leader, is reminding us of a statute that has exonerated the actions of each and every rowdy Trump supporter that day. As much as liberals hate it,…
Mystery Accuser Says Cuomo Was ‘Gentle Lover’ Who Deserves Second Chance
In a shocking development, the 133rd Cuomo accuser has stepped forward. But this one had a much different message. A burly woman named Chrissy aggressively grabbed a microphone and issued her prepared remarks. “After a lot of thought, I think we should keep Andrew in power. As a beautiful woman in a dress, let me tell you, I…