Abercrombie & Fitch Pressured To Drop Trump Modeling Campaign

Abercrombie & Fitch Pressured To Drop Trump Modeling Campaign

New Albany, OH — Abercrombie & Fitch will no longer be showcasing Donald Trump’s upcoming modeling campaign, the clothing company announced Saturday.  The cancellation comes as fears mount that the President isn’t a creepy, liberal, hack Democrat groomer—something that is considered mandatory in the fashion industry.       “He’s Hitler.  And this time, we mean it,”…

NCAA: Trump U Destroys Crooked Hill College 145-44, Advance To Face Dominion Tech

NCAA: Trump U Destroys Crooked Hill College 145-44, Advance To Face Dominion Tech

HOUSTON, TX — Trump University easily beat Crooked Hill College Saturday night and has advanced to play Dominion Tech in the NCAA tournament. “I told these players if they joined our great school, they’d eventually get tired of winning, and that’s exactly what’s happening,” President Donald Trump said following the game. Crooked Hill entered the…

Little-Known Biden Staffer Encourages President To Give Speech On Psychotomimetic Trichotillomania

Little-Known Biden Staffer Encourages President To Give Speech On Psychotomimetic Trichotillomania

WASHINGTON, D.C. — A little-known and devastatingly handsome Biden staffer has convinced the president to address psychotomimetic trichotillomania, a rare and psychotic desire to pull out one’s hair.    “Listen, Joe. A lotta people are saying you should be talking about psychotomimetic trichotillomania, ok? Frankly, if I’m honest, you’ve sorta choked with the whole economy,…