The few remaining villagers of the little-known tribe of MinnHeeHee [click] Sota of Botswana have started to grow worried in recent days. Their concern is that, no matter how many of their people they sacrifice to a local tyrannical crocodile, its hunger doesn’t seem to be satisfied. The locals explain that this particular massive and…
Category: World & Weather
All Branches Of Military Reassigned To Keep Hunter Biden From Breaking Laws
As Hillary Clinton once said, “It takes a village” to keep Bill from molesting his staff. Unfortunately, the Biden family is learning it will take far more manpower to keep Hunter out of trouble. So on Monday, the White House asked the Air Force, Army, Coast Guard, Marine Corps, Navy, and Space Force if they…
Biden On Photos Of Kids Wrapped In Aluminum Blankets: ‘Who’s Up For Burritos?’
Despite the media trying to convince Americans that ‘kids in cages’ is the hot new indie band, images of the overcrowded border facilities have leaked. And Joe Biden gave a head-scratching response to the photos. “Waaa? What am I looking at here?” Biden said holding the picture sideways. “These look delicious—who’s up for burritos?” The…
Pentagon Owns Tucker Carlson By Moving All Pregnant Soldiers To The Front Lines
Recently Fox News’ Tucker Carlson made the radical assertion that the US military shouldn’t be sending women to fight our wars. It’s a claim so outrageous many believe the idea originated from QAnon or worse; a Chick-Fil-A break room. Naturally, all national security efforts screeched to a halt the moment Carlson uttered these words. But…
Now In Charge, Teachers Unions Take Over United Nations
After taking a stranglehold of the country, the teachers unions have naturally begun to guide the United States through international affairs. On Wednesday, four of the more ornery members of the Chicago school union addressed the United Nations. “Quiet down! Listen for your name and say ‘here’!” a teacher screeched before doing roll call with…