White House: Wave Of ‘Died Suddenly’ Incidences Likely Due To Gas Stoves

White House: Wave Of ‘Died Suddenly’ Incidences Likely Due To Gas Stoves

WASHINGTON, DC – As the wave of people dying suddenly reaches preposterous levels, the likely cause is something many people have quietly suspected. Gas stoves. If you’re skeptical, consider this:  Even Joe Biden is now saying these appliances are to blame—and he’s a legitimate President. “My fellow A..Ar..Armenians, unless you’ve been living under Iraq for…

Experts Now Believe Grinch’s Heart Growing Three Sizes That Day Was Due To Vaccine

Experts Now Believe Grinch’s Heart Growing Three Sizes That Day Was Due To Vaccine

Mt. CRUMPIT — Medical experts now have strong cause to believe that the Grinch suffered from a massive case of myocarditis following his third Johnson & Johnson shot. Before the discovery, it was widely assumed that the Grinch’s heart rapidly grew three sizes because of his newfound understanding of the meaning of Christmas.  “Unfortunately, we…