Rudy Gobert, the two-time NBA defensive player of the year for the Utah Jazz, is often known for shutting down players on the opposing team. But now he may have gone too far by shutting down the whole league. “I knew I was good, but I didn’t think I was capable of this,” said a…
Category: Health
Democrats Shine as CDC Suggest Staying Home From Work Amid Covid-19 Outbreak
After the CDC suggested the possible need to avoid the workplace to reduce the risk of catching the coronavirus, the nation’s Democrats are turning in a brilliant performance of abandoning their jobs. “We’ve never seen this kind of dedication to disease prevention,” praised a CDC official. “Democrats everywhere are avoiding work at normal to slightly-above-normal…
Democrats Demand Trump Administration Solve Coronavirus Crisis Michelle Obama-Style
Donald Trump and Mike Pence are making a huge blunder by not solving the Coronavirus problem the Michelle Obama way, Democrats are saying. “The great Michelle laid out the tried and true way of resolving huge international problems!” shouted Chuck Schumer on the Senate floor. “She would identify what’s being cruel, whip out her Sharpie…
Bernie Guarantees 100% Childhood Literacy With New Book: “Learn To Read (Or Die)”
Senator Bernie Sanders left the nation in awe this week after unveiling his new children’s book titled: “Learn to Read (or Die)”. According to Sanders, this book is “guaranteed” to give America a 100% literacy rate among youngsters. The book’s title, which ends in “(or Die)” is raising eyebrows with Americans. But in Bernie’s twelve…