Joe Biden has spent the last 49 years in politics and the man has picked up all the tricks along the way. During an afternoon rally in Iowa, Biden claimed he invented the Ziploc bag, soiled himself and fell off the stage. It seems as soon as Democrats learned of Biden’s accomplishments, his poll numbers…
Category: Health
Medical Examiner: Autopsy Clearly Shows Epstein Committed Suicide With Cotton Ball And Piece Of Lint
A medical examiner and former Clinton aid has ruled that accused sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein definitely committed suicide using a cotton ball and some pocket lint. “Oh yeah. Seen it a hundred times,” said the examiner. “Actually, thousands of times now that I think about it.” The official autopsy report suffered an unusual delay as…
New All-Government-Run Hospital Accidentally Leaves Roll Of Red Tape Inside Patient On First Surgery
In what was supposed to be a groundbreaking day for Democrats, the first ever all-government-run hospital suffered some embarrassing news. Reports are that the surgeons, who were performing a routine appendectomy, became so inundated with bureaucratic red tape, they accidentally left a roll of it inside the patient. “THIS DOESN’T COUNT!” a frantic Bernie Sanders…
Julian Castro Slammed For Publishing Secret Family Recipe For Cooking Trump Supporters
Julian Castro is showing Democrat voters he’ll do anything to get over 1% in the polls. On Tuesday, Castro dangerously used his Twitter account to expose all the San Antonio citizens who made donations to President Trump. Now he’s taking things to a whole new level. Early Wednesday, Julian Castro again took to Twitter, this…
Elizabeth Warren Releases Flowchart To Clarify When She'd Use Nuclear Weapon
During Tuesday’s debate, Elizabeth Warren received some criticism for appearing too reluctant on using nuclear weapons. To clear up any confusion her campaign decided to clarify her stance by releasing a handy flowchart for all voters to see. “A responsible person should be transparent when detonating nuclear weapons,” Warren told The Glorious American. “At least…