Say what you will about liberals, but they sure do know their way around guns and cars. So after Joe Biden told Americans they will save .16 cents on their 4th of July meal (in red states), Democrats everywhere began filling their gas tanks with slightly more affordable mustard. “Did you see the tweet from…
Category: Economic

Pangolin ‘Likely Responsible’ For Soaring Inflation Joe Biden Says
Inflation is getting so high even Hunter Biden is worried. But his father has already determined why it’s happening. “Look, we all know what’s going on here, folks,” Joe Biden began. “It was a Trump-supporting pangolin who set off a chain reaction that my administration is now dealing with. I think he was licking himself or something and…

New Biden Stimulus Just Sheet Of Plywood
In what many are calling overly generous, the Biden administration is mailing struggling Americans a 2’ x 3’ sheet of plywood in place of stimulus cash. With plywood only days away from becoming more valuable than gold, the decision might be a brilliant one. “Jen, why plywood? Why not give Americans regular dollars?” a reporter…

Teachers: We’d Feel Much Safer Once We Get Our BMW 7 Series 750i
It seems our society continues to fail our most honorable heroes. In a recent press conference, the teachers unions reminded Americans they have yet to receive their complimentary BMW 7 Series 750i. “I know we’d all feel much safer once we get that car,” a representative said. “Unlike the private sector, some teachers are forced…

Now In Charge, Teachers Unions Take Over United Nations
After taking a stranglehold of the country, the teachers unions have naturally begun to guide the United States through international affairs. On Wednesday, four of the more ornery members of the Chicago school union addressed the United Nations. “Quiet down! Listen for your name and say ‘here’!” a teacher screeched before doing roll call with…