Former President Barack Obama took to Twitter this week to remind Americans that while it looks like Trump’s doing it, it’s secretly he who is orchestrating the economy with his magic wand. Obama’s tweets, both of which are raising eyebrows, read: “Eleven years ago today, I stared down the economy and threatened to call it…
Category: Economic
Bloods to Absorb the Yang Gang
The fellas over at the Bloods have announced they are finalizing a deal to absorb Andrew Yang’s followers, known as: The Yang Gang. As membership in the Bloods dwindles and Andrew Yang’s candidacy has stalled, the Blood’s head recruiter, Lil’ Cruiter, approached Yang to discuss the acquisition. “I’ll be honest, I wasn’t thrilled to lose…
Joe Biden To Coal Miners: ‘Better Learn to do Windows 95’
Fictional President, Joe Biden gave coal miners a super helpful suggestion earlier this week. “Ya, know…all you guys with your dirty faces and your yucky hammers, listen up!” Biden yelled to a group of angry, New Hampshire coal miners. “When I look at this bunch of 50 and 60-year-old men, I see the future wave…
Ben Shapiro Angrily Totals Value of Hanukkah Gifts in Preparation For Elizabeth Warren’s Wealth Tax
Ben Shapiro is begrudgingly totaling up the value of his family’s Hanukkah gifts in anticipation of Elizabeth Warren’s wealth tax. Different from an income tax, Warren’s wealth tax plans to bludgeon Americans based on how much all their stuff is worth. “Oh, yeah! A new iPad!” Shapiro’s daughter yelled upon opening the gift. “Don’t forget…
Vermont Police on Lookout for Package Thief
Please take a moment to look at the picture above. If this man looks familiar, please alert the Vermont authorities. This man has been combing Vermont’s Chittenden County neighborhoods, swiping packages off of porches left and right. Package thieves, or “porch pirates”, are common in Vermont but this particular thief represents the top 1% in…