WASHINGTON, DC – “Amid a whirlwind of evidence piling up against the President, we’re learning that Joe Biden may have committed some ‘light treason.’ But remember his son Beau died? So who are we, a simple news outlet, to report on his international felonies? That would be gross.” That was the first and only paragraph…
Category: Media & Tech
Fox News Hires Consultant LeBron James To Help Fix Rating Problems
NEW YORK, NY — After Fox News fired their wildly popular primetime host, Tucker Carlson, few could have predicted Americans would stop watching the channel. Thankfully, star basketball dribbler and notable high school graduate LeBron James has graciously offered to help FNC with its newest rating disaster. “I’ve seen this before,” James said, walking to…
San Diego News Team Distances Themselves From ‘Inappropriate’ Don Lemon
SAN DIEGO, CA – Don Lemon is acting inappropriately, and Ron Burgundy’s news team will not tolerate it. The four lead anchors of San Diego’s Channel 4 News are distancing themselves after Lemon remarked that all women should come with an expiration date like milk, ‘so society knows when to throw them out.’ “Son of…
Embarrassing: Ben Shapiro Goes All Day With His White Privilege Hanging Out
South Florida– Onlookers near Ben Shapiro couldn’t help but notice the podcast host’s white privilege was completely exposed all Saturday afternoon. “I know being controversial is ‘his thing,’ but this was just horrifying,” a concerned Democrat mother of three said. “But it was just all hanging out. Totally brazen. I’ve never seen anything like it.” Most of…
Online Conservatives Ruthlessly Savage Brian Krassenstein By Noticing His Perverted Tweets
FORT MYERS, FL – Famous leftist and Biden super-fan Brian Krassenstein is claiming conservatives on Twitter have gone too far by noticing his super perverted and predatory tweets. “This is total bull s***! I am getting torn apart by conservatives on Twitter who are claiming I’m ok with little kids seeing naked men—when in reality,…