NEW YORK, NY — Since firing Tucker Carlson, the great Fox News Channel has opted just to film the TV in their break room showing CNN.  The new programming came shortly after the network saw its prime-time audience plummet to a tier industry insiders call ‘pure donkey s***’ or ‘WNBA levels.’ After the first evening…

ATLANTA, GA — CNN’s 40-year streak of being honorable and trustworthy ended this weekend when the network announced Don Lemon had been fired for repeatedly being a complete retard–something he had been warned about for 17 years while at the network. Thankfully, the always-classy Anthony Weiner has agreed to anchor the 9 PM hour. “You…

ATLANTA, GA — Announced via billboard in front of Don Lemon’s Atlanta condo, CNN revealed Don Lemon Tonight had been canceled. Naturally, Jordan Peterson will be taking his place. Lemon was shocked and demanded answers. “I host the worst-rated show for over a decade, and just because I’m black, I get canceled?” he tweeted. “CNN will be hearing from my lawyers, Michael Cohen…

NASHVILLE, TN–The Daily Wire’s habit of hiring anyone who gets canceled continued Wednesday when founder Jeremy Boreing signed Shamu after SeaWorld said they’d be ending their orca show.  The whale’s firing came after a multi-year legal battle centered around Black Lives Matter claiming the animal was black, while the state of Utah argued it was…