ATLANTA, GA– Failed CNN host Don Lemon, now the host of X’s little-known show When Life Gives You Gay Lemons, remains in critical condition Tuesday after an intern called him ‘Donald’ earlier this week.  Doctors say Lemon is lucky to be alive after suffering two strokes, a grand mal seizure, and soiling himself. Those who witnessed…

HARRISBURG, PA — In a rare public appearance, Willie Brown’s girlfriend squinted carefully and, with great focus, managed to say over 900 words. Unfortunately for her two dozen viewers, most of the words were in random order. Thankfully, the media has been working through the night to piece them all into their correct order. “Now,…

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – An attention-seeking TikTok video created by a big fat lib went viral this week. In the video, San Francisco resident Karen McKarenson is warning Bay Area residents that the city has become so violent the only reason to leave their homes is to vote for Democrats or if they want to…

MEMPHIS, TN — The National Civil Rights Museum is proud to announce the latest addition to its collection:  The chair that bravely fought to support Whoopi Goldberg’s humongous ass from early 2007 through February of 2007. The chair is from the set of The View, a daytime show made popular by unemployed, divorced women. After…

Palo Alto, CA — After years of trying to purge conservatives off of their platform, Facebook has decided to cut to the chase and simply ask all users to confirm that they’re a huge liberal upon logging in.  If you refuse to check the small circle next to the words: “Are you a huge liberal?”…