WHITTIER, CA — Los Angeles convenience store owner Omid Kamran has not been robbed in over three weeks after making some shrewd price adjustments. To help stimulate crime, California lawmakers passed Prop 47, which legalized theft under $950. So Omid simply priced every item in his store at $951. And the results have been astonishing.…
Category: Law
Ending Roe v. Wade 'Only 3%' Of What Clarence Thomas Did Last Year
WASHINGTON, DC – If you listen to the media, you would think Justice Clarence Thomas spent all of last year dismantling Roe Vs. Wade. However, a new report shows that only 3% of Thomas’ year was spent protecting infants. “A whopping 97% of his 2022 was classified as ‘other services.’ These activities are things like…
Antifa To Boycott Any State That Requires Voter I.D. Laws
ATLANTA, GA — If state lawmakers aren’t careful, they might soon drive away their local Antifa chapter. The leadership of the group has announced their intention to completely boycott any state that requires I.D.s for voting. “We get one sniff of that uncivilized restriction, and we’ll pack up our stuff and leave,” an Antifa leader…
Today Marks 5 Year Anniversary Of Trump Pardoning Prison Mike
WASHINGTON, DC — It was a tearjerker on the White House lawn as President Trump announced the pardon of the infamous thief and kidnapper known as Prison Mike. That was five years ago today. “Get up here, Mike!” Trump famously yelled at the criminal currently on parole. “Ya know, a lot of people tell me…
Car Jacking Victim Gets FBI To Hunt Down Attacker By Claiming He Was Pro-Life
HAYWARD, CA – After Renee Porter’s 2021 Chevy Malibu was carjacked by a gun-wielding Biden voter, it seemed recovering the vehicle was hopeless. But Renee had a trick up her sleeve. “I told the authorities my attacker was pro-life. I yelled, ‘This bloodthirsty man wasn’t even bloodthirsty for the citizens too young to vote Democrat!’…