Huge news in the social network world as Donald Trump has unveiled ‘MAGA Phone’, a new phone that allows conservatives to finally get their voices heard. The genius of the new handheld device is that it’s completely detached from the whiny Karens over at big tech. “My new phone will put the iPhone to shame,”…
Category: Media & Tech
Twitter Gives Mitt Romney All The Followers
Millions of Twitter users found themselves homeless after the platform was kind enough to disconnect them from dangerous conservatives. Naturally, Twitter plugged everyone into Mitt Romney’s feed. “This way, all our users can get a steady diet of state-approved content,” Twitter CEO, Jack Dorsey said. “Lately, Mitt has been a torchbearer for some pretty awesome…
Don Lemon: ‘America Has Embarrassed Herself In Front Of CHAZ’
It’s been a rough few days for America. Thankfully, Don Lemon was there to help put things in perspective. “Rioting. Breaking things. Seriously? I, for one, demand to know where these unhappy protestors got the idea that these actions were acceptable,” a fuming Lemon said. “And to make matters worse, America has embarrassed herself in…
“We’ve Seen Enough!” Fox News Calls Georgia For Democrats With 0.2% Votes In
After seeing 0.2% of votes, the crew over at Fox News was able to clock out early. Four minutes after the Georgia Senate polls opened, the highly brilliant and capable FNC decision desk made the call. “Folks, we’ve just seen an avalanche of data,” Bill Hemmer informed. “My sister’s old roommate lives in Atlanta and…
Wal-Mart Shoots Off Puzzling Tweet To Senator Josh Hawley
On Wednesday Republican Josh Hawley tweeted that he was not super thrilled that Joe Biden stole the Presidential election. Naturally, Americans sat back and waited for Wal-Mart’s response. Minutes later, the megastore came out swinging. “Sum ting wong with Josh Hawree! Bidon win! Hawree so redicurus!” their tweet read. It was an odd response that,…