Do you remember when the government forbid you from earning a living during the last ten months? Well, it looks like help is on the way. Yes, your bank account will soon say $600.21 after congress recently approved a $32 Trillion stimulus package, of which 4% will go to struggling Americans. To explain just how…
Category: Economic
Check Your Mailbox: 2021 White Privilege Benefits Catalog To Arrive Soon
Keep an eye on your mailbox for your 2021 White Privilege benefits catalog. Sources tell The Glorious American white people can expect another carefree year of paradise, free from stress and adverse consequences of any kind. The 2021 benefits catalog details how most major hotels and rental car companies will now offer free upgrades. For…
Despite Pressure, Local Business Owner Refuses To Release Statement On Black Lives Matter
6-year-old Gracie Peters continues to resist the social media mob as thousands of furious social justice warriors demand her business to make a statement in support of Black Lives Matter. Instead, the young owner of ¢25 Lemonade in Macon, Georgia, keeps making the hysterical claim that she only wants to deliver ice-cold, refreshing lemonade for a…
As Fox News Viewership Dries Up, Nation Becomes Overrun With Unsold My Pillows
If you thought COVID was dangerous, wait until a bunch of fluffy My Pillows slowly avalanche towards your city. But unlike COVID, the pillow thing is actually happening. Currently, the state of Minnesota is being overrun with My Pillows after the sharp collapse of the company’s main advertising source, Fox News. Fox News’ loyal audience…
Joe Biden Appoints Dominion Voting Machines To Handle All Metrics For His Presidency
In a touching ceremony, the media’s selection for President, Joe Biden, announced that the Dominion voting machines would be asked to handle all the metrics for his 25-day long presidency. “Economic numbers, COVID deaths, GDP—this little guy is going to tell me all the numbers we want to hear,” Biden said putting his arm around…