Los Angeles, CA– Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard has released another message for the world. Oddly, this time, it was a handwritten message tied to a brick and thrown through a window of the LA Times. According to Hubbard, Scientologists are getting a little freaked out by Joe Biden and the Democrats. “Liberals need to…
Category: Biden
‘F–k Joe Biden’ Chant Breaks Out At Biden Dinner Table
DELAWARE- On Friday, the popular ‘F–k Joe Biden’ chant that all Americans therapeutically scream finally came to the fictional President’s dinner table. Momentum for the explicit chant picked up steam when the dinner conversation drifted towards Joe Biden’s job approval. “Man, what haven’t you f–ked up, pops?!” Hunter yelled, bouncing a biscuit off his father’s…
Joe Biden Looking Forward To Plagiarizing Bill Pullman’s Speech From Independence Day
WASHINGTON, DC— As we all know, it’s been decided that fictional president Joe Biden will be forbidden from making any public appearance for the rest of his life. However, the White House will begrudgingly allow the old man to conduct his most cherished tradition. Stealing Bill Pullman’s famous speech from the 1996 film Independence Day.…
Joe Biden Lands Huge Endorsement From Creed Bratton
NEW YORK, NY — Because she’s known for her nasty and rude on-air demeanor, Dana Perino famously has a hard time finding guests for her afternoon Fox News show Listen Up Stupid, Dummies. So it was no surprise when her only guest on Thursday was Dunder Mifflin’s quality assurance manager, Creed Bratton. “Creed, you lived…
White House Doctor: 'Joe’s Having Such A Bad Week He Actually Remembers Some Of It'
WASHINGTON, DC – How bad was Joe Biden’s week? Well, according to his personal doctor, the news was so monumentally catastrophic for him; the fictional president actually recalled some of the specific events. “I knew something was wrong when he woke up, and he remembered who he was,” the doctor explained. “But then he yelled, ‘That damn…