WASHINGTON, DC — Democrats everywhere keep getting deflated to learn hate crime after hate crime turns out to be a hoax. Joe Biden, known for his deep political savvy, detected his loyal base is craving horrible racist acts more than ever. So the fictional president is acting. “The supply and demand of real racism is…
Category: Biden
'I Don't Need A Ride, I Need Ammo!' Joe Biden Yells Passing Through Every Democrat-Run City
CHICAGO, IL— As Fictional President Joe Biden makes his way through Democrat-run cities, he has repeatedly been heard screaming, “I don’t need a ride, I need ammo!” as mobs of criminals chase him. In a recent visit to Chicago to congratulate Lori Lightfoot on its big surgery, Joe wandered off to look for ice cream…
Biden: 'We Must Destroy This Nation, But We Must Do It Together'
WASHINGTON, D.C. — With Willie Brown’s girlfriend sitting behind him, Fictional President, Joe Biden addressed the nation that funds Ukraine on Tuesday. As always, his goal was to incite violence and start a civil war by the weekend. But there was a distinct moment of unity: “Now listen, Chuck, the polling is clear; we all…
Fumigation Companies Now Offering The ‘Afghanistan-Package’ Where They Forget To Get The People Out First
DOVER, DE — After the fictional President’s decision to leave thousands of Americans behind enemy lines in Afghanistan, many fumigation companies were inspired to create the ‘Biden Package,’ a special option that forgets to get all the people out of the house first before spraying the deadly pesticides. “People don’t understand how much preparation it takes…
White House To Impose 1-Day Lockdown On Tuesday So They Can Take Credit For All 158 Million Jobs Coming Back On Wednesday
WASHINGTON, DC – In need of a little positive economic news, fictional president Joe Biden will mandate all businesses lockdown for one day starting on Tuesday. When asked, Biden said the stay-at-home order was because “The monkey pop is coming, and no one’s butt is safe.” But skeptics believe the real reason was given at…