After Michael Avenatti was declared a criminal, the media darling has cleared the important and final step for becoming a Democrat presidential candidate. As Avenatti was being walked from the courthouse to a squad car, he delivered this brief victory speech: “To those who doubted that this young man from northern California could one day…
Category: Law
Vermont Police on Lookout for Package Thief
Please take a moment to look at the picture above. If this man looks familiar, please alert the Vermont authorities. This man has been combing Vermont’s Chittenden County neighborhoods, swiping packages off of porches left and right. Package thieves, or “porch pirates”, are common in Vermont but this particular thief represents the top 1% in…
Pelosi to Briefly Allow Prayer Back in Schools Because She is So Saddened and Heartbroken to Impeach
An absolutely distraught and devastated Pelosi will temporarily allow prayer back into public schools as she reluctantly impeaches President Trump again. “WHY!!??!?!?” the Speaker screamed as she threw up her arms and crumbled to the floor, Wednesday morning. “This day is so solemn I cannot believe it! I’ve been praying so much to… to… umm,…
Only 17 Egregious Errors! James Comey’s Parents Proudly Hang IG Report On Fridge
James Comey’s parents, Joan and Brian were delighted to learn Inspector General, Michael Horowitz had officially recognized their baby boy’s terrific work. “Would you look at that,” Brian Comey said in awe as he taped the IG report to the refrigerator. “Only 17 egregious errors. This is some of Jim’s best work.” As Joan also…
William Barr Asks For Truckloads Of Fresh Underwear Be Rushed To DC As More FBI Documents Are Found
Thousands of former Obama officials began uncontrollably pooping their pants moments after the DOJ got their hands on more FBI documents. It is believed that Barr’s DOJ has found evidence linking the “deep state” to criminal acts and members of the swamp may actually be prosecuted. When first called upon, FEMA began filling their trucks…