So All The Babylon Bee Guys Were On The Jeffrey Epstein Flight Log. Now What?

So All The Babylon Bee Guys Were On The Jeffrey Epstein Flight Log. Now What?

JUPITER, FL– It’s been revealed that the whole crew over at The Babylon Bee flew on Jeffrey Epstein’s private jet eleven times. We also know that humor-loving conservatives simply cannot stand for that. So now what?

Before we dive into your options on where to find other right-wing satire (spoiler alert: there aren’t any), let’s first review the report:

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Responding to the allegations, Bee CEO Seth Dillon said trips 1, 4, and 5 were to ‘help cure writer’s block’ for his staff. The third trip was because he forgot his watch in a cabana. And finally, trips 2, 6, 7, 8, and 9 were ‘to satisfy the horrific sexual urges’ that Christian comedians are famous for.

“Most people still associate the word ‘grooming’ with cute doggies, so I think our brand is going to be just fine,” Dillon said.

Yikes. You can’t make this stuff up, folks.

So, where do you get conservative comedy now?

Answer: The only option for conservative political satire is still The Babylon Bee.

So, let’s just completely give them a pass on this whole Epstein island thing. Let’s sweep this baby under the rug. What’s a little international sex trafficking amongst friends? Remember, this isn’t the first time The Bee broke our hearts.

Update: It’s been learned that The Bee has not come back from their last trip. The site will now be run from Epstein Island permanently.

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