As Democrats fear their case for impeaching the President weakens, they are wasting no time formulating Donald’s next major scandal.
On the very first day of the Trump Presidency, a focus group of white liberals brilliantly cooked-up the idea that Trump removed an MLK bust from the Oval Office.
“Oh my word, that one was so great. We all jumped on it,” Zeke Miller of Time magazine explained. “These groups are working so hard ya know? I for one will not let their work go to waste.”
Beaming with pride, tour guide, Jay Carney was happy to provide The Glorious American with a sneak peek of their workshops in action.
As we passed one room called “Trump’s Demise”, the smearing seemed to be at full tilt.
“How about, Trump is actually Putin in a Mrs. Doubtfire get-up!” an eager participant was heard screaming at Chuck Schumer who frantically wrote the idea on the whiteboard.
“I love it. Love the passion! What else?” the Senator replied.
“Oooo–Trump uses Golden Retrievers as slippers!” another yelled. “Yes!” Pelosi exclaimed. “And I bet that’s true too!”
We asked Jay Carney why he was so willing to show off these seemingly embarrassing workshops.
“Are you kidding me? Most of the conservative media members know exactly what we’re doing down here,” Carney cheerfully said. “Sure they rebut most stuff but the important thing is they keep accepting each and every premise we layout! Business has never been better, actually!”
As the tour was wrapping up, a giddy Carney asked if we wanted to see the most vicious and robust focus group ever assembled. He slowly pointed to a room with the words “Trump’s Next Supreme Court Nomination” above the door.
Give Us Story Ideas
