Immediately following the Republican National Convention, the Democrats ushered notorious MS-13 gang member, Miguel ‘Bone Killer’ Lopez to the podium to give their official response.
The networks had to bleep out a large percentage of Bone Killer’s remarks due to horrifying language, but it seems he demanded the abolishment of the second amendment, the return of California back to Mexico, and taxpayer-funded sex changes. Typical Democrat talking points.
To the Democrats’ surprise, Trump immediately agreed to the California demand, tweeting: “Done. You’ve got a deal, Bone Killer.” Even more shocking; the paperwork to cut-off California had been drawn up within the hour.
“I’m a deal maker,” Trump commented. “I tried to offload Portland in the deal as well, but Mr. Killer was a tough negotiator. One tough cookie. We’ll have to think of some other way to get rid of Portland.”
Critics argue the Democrats should not have embraced the MS-13 gang due to the vast number of deaths they have caused. However, Nancy Pelosi reminded everyone that net neutrality has killed far more.
Because of the thick language barrier, firing off a handgun into the air and a steady stream of the F word, the speech is not being well received by anyone except Joe and Hunter Biden.
“Listen, fat. Those were the most brilliant, articulate, beautiful words I’ve ever heard!” the former VP said wiping a tear from his eye.