In a rare public appearance, Joe Biden was seen wearing a cheerleader’s outfit and openly cheering on a violent mob on Tuesday. Naturally, the national polls are showing that average Americans ‘loved seeing that’ from Biden and the fictional President’s approval rating skyrocketed to 84% approval.
“I’m not surprised,” said a national pollster. “History tells us that average Americans love the party who’s rooting for death, violence, and anarchy. Throw sweet innocent ol’ Joe dressed like a teenaged girl in the mix and he may sweep all 50 states.”
Biden’s popularity spiked when the camera captured him cheering on a mob as they destroyed a Walgreens while he quietly chanted, “Bang bang, choo choo train, Come on looters—do the, ya know, thang!”
As Biden waved his pom-poms and did an impressive routine, Donald Trump was on the phone with several Democrat senators imploring them to re-hire their police force.
Update: Biden’s cheerleading ended after he saw a reflection of himself dressed as a girl. He spent the rest of the night trying to find a way to sniff his own hair.
Give Us Story Ideas
