, ,

Bernie Updates His Label To “Democratic Socialist Who-Won’t-Flatten-You-With-Government-Vehicle”

Bernie Updates His Label To “Democratic Socialist Who-Won’t-Flatten-You-With-Government-Vehicle”

This morning Senator Bernie Sanders was forced to expand his label from “Democratic Socialist“ to “Democratic Socialist who-won’t-flatten-you-with-government-vehicle.”

When reached for comment, Sanders explained, “There is so much misinformation about what I stand for! Making this simple clarification should reassure my belief that NO American should be mowed over with a vehicle!”

Despite Sanders’ statement, he would later contradict himself in a town hall event saying, “In a Bernie economy, the only people who are going to be plowed over are the millionaires and billionaires,” which was met with enthusiasm and applause.