When Joe Biden took the oath of office on January 20th, he did so carrying the hopes, dreams, and urges of perverts everywhere. Minutes after laying his hand on the Bible (and then unceremoniously shouting, “Should I be touching this after where my hands have been?”), Joe Biden became the first openly perverted President…
Category: Featured

Biden Orders Hamster Feeders Be Installed For National Guard
Order has been restored in the Capitol building parking garage after Joe Biden ordered hamster feeders be installed for the National Guardsmen. Also, as a thank you for risking their lives for our country, a large exercise wheel was assembled. The 45,000 troops were brought to DC to make sure Biden didn’t wander off before…

Chris Wallace Grills Biden: ‘Did It Hurt, Sir? When You Fell From Heaven?’
Fictional President Joe Biden entered the lion’s den this week when he appeared on Chris Wallace’s show. Wallace, who once applied sunscreen to Obama’s back so evenly it made Barack cry, didn’t hold back. “You know what, President Biden? Here at Fox, our ratings are low and people are demanding accountability more than ever. So…

China And Iran Strike Historic Agreement On Who Gets To Blackmail Joe Biden First
Dictators in China and Iran have reached a historic agreement regarding which country will be allowed to blackmail Joe Biden first. Like all of Biden’s illegal dealings, details of the negotiations were leaked. “Ok, everyone relax! We’ll all have plenty of time to blackmail Joe and weaken America.” George Stephanopoulos yelled on a Zoom call…

Biden Throws Party As Hundreds Die Of COVID On His Watch
It sure was a disgusting display of non-leadership from Joe Biden on Wednesday. As hundreds of Americans were dying from COVID, the sorry excuse for a man partied and laughed. It was a callous and gutless way to begin his term and many are demanding answers. “Why?!” Screamed a DC-area nurse in between TikTok videos. …