Spending 60 years in politics, you pick up a few tricks. And during a recent press briefing, Joe Biden whipped out one of his better moves.
When a question from Fox News’ Peter Doocy was beginning to sound tough, Joe Biden appeared to die.
“Ladies and gentlemen, President Biden has obviously passed away,” a staffer said, stepping in front of the podium. “So you’re all free to leave.”
Nearby, Dr. Fauci yelled, “I believe the science says a softball question from CNN could revive our strong leader!”
Thirty-two CNN journalists jumped at the opportunity. Biden’s head popped up, showcasing that overly aggressive smile we all love so much.
“Mr. President, thank you for miraculously rising from the dead. Trump could never do that. What is it you want the terrorists to know?” the reporter asked.
“I will not forgive,” he said sternly. “They disrupted my vacation, I will never forgive them for that. Also, I won’t forget. You know, the thing they did–I will not forget whatever they did or didn’t do. But make no mistake, we will hunt down whoever did this and make they/them/ theirs pay.”
Doocy then stood up and insisted his question be heard. But in yet another display of toughness, Joe Biden slowly bent down and laid on his back, displaying his soft underbelly.
“Are… are you actually laying in a submissive pose?” the Fox News reporter asked. But it was too late. The White House announced Biden had regrettably died again.
Update: When it was time to revive the President again, someone casually mentioned it was ‘take your daughters to work day’ and he leaped to his feet in under a second.
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