BOULDER, CO — Parents everywhere are asking famed lawyer, Sidney Powell, to stop calling their children and hyping up how great their Christmas presents will be.
“Oh, these presents you’ll be unwrapping on Christmas? I’ll just say, wear a helmet. Because your freaking head is going to explode,” Powell told seven-year-old Elizabeth Miller. “Yeah. It’s going to be absolutely Biblical.”
After the phone call, it took Elizabeth’s parents two hours to manage their daughter’s expectations.
“That’s bull, dad! You just wait ‘till Christmas morning, I’m going to unwrap the kraken on both your a**es!” the child yelled to her parents.
Hours later, Powell responded to the Millers with this cryptic tweet:
I hear the lies coming from Pete and Debbie Miller. They know. Soon you will too. #TsunamiChristmas #MyLittlePonyOnSteorids #DeathByGift #ChristmasKraken!
“I’m literally holding the receipt from Walmart, and we only spent $32,” said total RINO, Pete Miller, who’s clearly in on the whole thing.
Despite the Millers’ restraining order against the lawyer, Sidney and Elizabeth still maintain the quiet confidence that what’s under the tree will, in fact, make the child’s freaking head explode.
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