It recently came to light that President Trump made the US Postal Service incompetent for the last 25 years and Democrats are demanding answers.
“We now see he’s been plotting since around 1995,” NBC’s Chuck Todd explained on his Sunday show. “For decades Donald Trump has been making the post offices less reliable each month in order to steal the 2020 election. Each lost birthday card, each missing edition of Life-size Doll Monthly that my parents said was lost in the mail…it was always Trump.”
The President is also dealing with the swirling rumors that he convinced dozens of postal workers to bring their mail trucks to their maximum speed of 32mph and drive straight off a cliff.
“Wrong,” Trump told the press as he entered Marine One. “Those are just routine actions of mailmen, believe me. They hate their lives and frankly, who can blame them.”
Update: New fears have surfaced that President Trump is also considering making the DMV a sluggish and inept place of business.
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