At first glance, one would think the New York Times has done a massive about-face. The bold headline “We’ve Learned Our Lesson!” appears to come clean about their unfair treatment of conservatives. However, a closer look shows the editor apparently forgot to remove the laughing face emojis before going to print.
“That was an honest mistake,” admitted Editor, Dean Baquet. “It’s just, we want conservatives to buy our paper again. And I totally understand if they’re a bit leery of us. But they don’t have to read it, we just them to buy it. I cannot stress that part enough”, he concluded.
Despite leaving the emojis on the front page, the newspaper is confident they will not see a drop in subscribership. “Not possible,” Baquet explained. “We have top mathematicians who have assured us we cannot drop any further.”
Other New York Times writers were asked about their surprising new commitment towards journalistic integrity but after a few seconds of speaking to them, they each erupted in uncontrollable laughter with two giant tears coming from each eye.
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