As footage of the Portland protestor whose legs caught fire went viral, Americans everywhere ran to their computers and began editing the flaming man to synchronize with their favorite dance music. It was a fun time for all. See for yourself:
However, we soon learned the Democrat party was not too happy to see conservatives laugh at one of their brightest stars getting burnt to a crisp.
“What about that brave, young Portland man who was trying to set businesses on fire, but then set himself on fire?!” a reporter yelled at President Trump.
“I did see it. I stayed up for hours watching that 12-second video. So yes, I’m very familiar with it,” Trump replied. “But after looking into it, it’s going to be OK, he has insurance.”
Nancy Pelosi was furious with Trump’s remarks, but she collected herself and gave Antifa instructions should another comrade catch fire.
“Next time, throw the person who’s on fire through the window of a small business so we don’t waste the flames,” Pelosi told them. “It’s what they would have wanted. At the very least, it’s what I would have wanted.”
Update: Embarrassed by the footage, Antifa is now claiming the man purposely caught fire as a ceremonial tradition to ring in 100 more nights of riots in Portland.
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