For the democrat party, it’s been nothing but bad news for years. America’s lovable, scandal-free darling lost in 2016, Trump took out some of their favorite terrorists, and then they forgot to pick a nominee with a functioning brain.
But it seems their luck may have finally turned. Their absolute favorite thing has happened this week as news broke that swarms of foreign murderers were invading America.
“Finally! Some good news!” Nancy Pelosi yelled upon hearing that ferocious Murder Hornets were spotted coming over the border. “We were hoping the murderers were people—but we’ll take anything at this point. Foreign murders have dropped to dangerous levels lately, and we’re thrilled to hear those numbers spiked back up.”
Former Vice President Biden was also excited for the arrival of the horrifying insects commenting, “Now here’s a hornet I can sniff that won’t get caught up my nose.”
While the democrats celebrate the news, President Trump has the exact opposite opinion about the Murder Hornets.
“When I grew up, bees were tiny. Some might even say teeny tiny. And we liked it that way.” Trump informed. “But we must send them back. We have so many worker bees—great worker bees actually– in our nation. I will not allow their wages to be driven down by two-foot monster hornets. No way.”
Update: The Democrats are now demanding the Murder Hornets be referred to as ‘lifecycle concluding aerial agents’.