The CDC is issuing a new, “temporary” moratorium on the Taliban being mean. Particularly towards Joe Biden.
The moratorium came after the Taliban caused so much death and devastation, that Kamala Harris only laughed at the situation for a mere six minutes. Sources say Joe Biden has been so rattled by the violent group’s bullying, he’s been forgetful, unable to speak, and handsy around children.
“Since we nailed the whole COVID thing, we have expanded our authority a great deal. So we hereby forbid those horrible men from making Joe Biden look bad,” Rochelle Wolensky said. “Also, that whole religious civil war they’ve been fighting for five hundred years? Yeah, that’s on hold effective immediately too.”
After hearing the controversial edict, the Supreme Court promptly got involved. They placed a yellow sticky note on the courthouse doors that read: “Too scared of Democrats. Who are we kidding? You’re on your own.”
Update: Wolensky later announced she’s turning 23 next week, Tucker Carlson is dead last in the ratings, and Joe Biden won the 2020 election.
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