WASHINGTON, DC – Sometimes, Joe Biden can deliver some warm moments. Most of those instances require a pressure washer to clean up, but on Wednesday, the fictional President showed the world a different kind of warmth.
“Jackie was a close friend—oh, what am I sayin’? Hell, Jackie IS a close friend! She’ll never leave us—Isn’t that right?” Biden shouted to the family of deceased congresswoman Jackie Walorski. “Ya know what, where is ol’ Jackie? Bring her on up here. I’m waiting. I swear to god she had better get up here. Jackie, make some kind of noise, so we at least know you’re alive, for god’s sake. And I mean now!”
At this point, the auditorium was filled with the loud weeping of the mourning family, and a frustrated Biden chose to end his speech.
But before exiting the stage in the wrong direction, the fictional President outstretched his hand for one of his classic handshakes to no one.
“Fine, I’ll shake the hand of this ghost if Jackie is too busy to greet me,” Biden muttered under his breath.
Update: When Joe Biden returned to the microphone, he instructed everyone to put their hands together for the next speaker: George Floyd.
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