Biden White House Tries To Redefine ‘Pedophile’

Biden White House Tries To Redefine ‘Pedophile’

DELAWARE —The Biden White House has successfully lobbied Merriam-Webster’s dictionary to officially change the definition of the word: “pedophile.”

A White House statement reads:

“What is a pedophile? While some maintain that a pedophile is an adult who is sexually attracted to children, that is neither the official definition nor the way the men of the Biden family have historically preferred to define it.”

The new definition will be: “A: A man from Scranton who is known for showering without minors. Often, a childhood stutter will prohibit the pedophile from using any functioning brain activity. B: Pants pooper.”

“So if Republicans call the President or Hunter a pedophile and they don’t mean the new way, we’ll ask the Project for Eviscerating Disinformation Offences team to investigate them. Yes, PEDO is standing by, prowling around, ready to attack.” Karine Jean-Pierre said Wednesday. “This administration has dozens of PEDO members, led by Joe Biden, naturally. He’s probably the most committed PEDO this nation has ever seen. Although many believe, one day, Hunter will carry the torch as the most aggressive PEDO of all time.”  

Update:  Per White House request, Merriam-Webster’s dictionary has also updated the phrase ‘money laundering’ to mean:  “The act of helping Ukraine fight against Russia.”

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