, ,

Trump Discovers Two More States Off Texas Shore, Four GOP Senators To Be Added Soon

Trump Discovers Two More States Off Texas Shore, Four GOP Senators To Be Added Soon

While making a campaign stop in Corpus Christi, Texas, President Donald Trump made an astonishing discovery.

“Hold it.  I need a Diet Coke and an old-timey telescope.  Right away!” Trump abruptly yelled into the microphone.  “I think I see, what some would say…an opportunity.”

After a few seconds of holding the telescope up to his eye and peering towards the ocean, the President turned to the crowd and smiled. 

“Ladies and gentlemen, it’s exactly what I thought.  Would you believe there are two adorable little states roughly three leagues west?!” He asked while pointing to his discovery.  “Even as a young child I was always great at exploring, and I think it shows.  But you know what?  Those states need senators—and quickly!”

The audience, delirious with the good news, began chanting “Four-more-senators!” while Trump waved his fingers as if he were conducting their chants.    

“Ok.  Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to use this telescope to take a quick peek directly into the Sun, and then head back to Washington,” he said as campaign staff rushed to take the device away from him.

Update: Democrats are furious at Trump’s discovery and have begun frantically combing the California coastline for more states.