On Wednesday night, the Los Angeles Lakers dismissed Magic Johnson from his front-office role after he insisted all medical procedures be performed by Dr. J.
Initially, Magic told a group of reporters he was voluntarily stepping down because his role of team president was taking time away from tweeting. However, multiple sources tell The Glorious American that Lakers ownership was afraid Johnson was angling for Dr. J to perform all surgeries on Laker players.
“Of course I wanted Dr. J!” Magic sniped when asked. “If you need a doctor, why wouldn’t you hire the best?” Johnson admitted Dr. J lacked the traditional education and training all team doctors have, but he was unwavering with this confidence in Julius.
“Just give him that scalpel!” Magic said bursting into laughter. “As soon as Doctor J feels that surgical lighting over him and it’s time to perform? Ooohh—better grab your popcorn! Because there’s no doctor in the world who could deliver better than Doctor J. You see him go to work against the Celtics in 82?”
As more information is learned, it is becoming apparent the Lakers have been unable to land key free agents because players were horrified they would surely be killed should Doctor J conduct even the most routine medical procedure.
“It’s true I allowed Doctor J to practice on our G-League players and, yes, many of those young men were lost,” Magic admitted as he became emotional. “But I cannot think of a better way to go than under the knife of the great Doctor J.”