In a rare public appearance, Joe Biden was seen wearing a cheerleader’s outfit and openly cheering on a violent mob on Tuesday. Naturally, the national polls are showing that average Americans ‘loved seeing that’ from Biden and the former VP’s lead over Trump widened to 42 points.
“I’m not surprised,” said a national pollster. “History tells us that average Americans love the party who’s rooting for death, violence, and anarchy. Throw sweet innocent ol’ Joe dressed like a teenaged girl in the mix and he may sweep all 50 states.”
Biden’s popularity spiked when the camera captured him cheering on a mob as they destroyed a Walgreens while he quietly chanted, “Bang bang, choo choo train, Come on looters—do ya thang!”
As Biden waved his pom-poms and did an impressive routine, Donald Trump was on the phone with several Democrat senators imploring them to re-hire their police force.
“C’mon, do-nothing-dems! Your citizens are being beaten like dogs! You think you’ll get reelected this way?!” Trump yelled. But that sent the democrat governors into sidesplitting laughter. After catching their breath, they explained that Americans have finally been conditioned to blame everything bad on Trump.
Update: Biden’s cheerleading ended after he saw a reflection of himself dressed as a girl. He spent the rest of the night trying to find a way to sniff his own hair.