WASHINGTON, DC – Two-time election winner Donald Trump was indicted by a federal grand jury Wednesday for deliberately averting the Department of Justice’s task of framing him. The dramatic move came after Trump was given thousands of opportunities to commit actual crimes but refused.
“Crime or no crime, we simply want him in jail. Is that too much to ask?” Merrick Garland said. “But he’s showing a stubbornness typical Republicans usually don’t have. It’s completely inappropriate. As he awaits trial, I would remind him of the timeless Washington Proverb: WWRD. What Would Romney Do.”
“So the walls are closing in on your favorite President, huh? Yes, I’m sure they are.” Trump said during a recent rally. “I think Merrick, who many people say looks like a frightened goat, is doing… not so good at his job. Not so good.”
As expected, the indictment and dismissive comments from Trump have brought Adam Kinzinger to tears.
“First, Trump keeps documents that outs our top secret, undercover spy, Doug McCormick. Now he’s obstructing his framing? I’ve been screaming on the floor, weeping for the death of democracy!” Kinzinger tweeted.
Update: Kinzinger has now tweeted: “Now I’m weeping for the death of Doug McCoromik because Trump didn’t out him—my last tweet did, and he was killed. LOL! #oopsie #TrumpStillWorse
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