Las Vegas, NV— After Will Smith flipped-turned Chris Rock’s face upside down at the Oscars, his parents are demanding he move into his Auntie and Uncle’s house in Bel-Air.
Moments before the slap heard ’round the world, Chris Rock gave a moving speech about how black-on-black crime is a myth. Then, needing to lighten the mood, Rock did a tight five minutes on how ugly Will Smith’s wife is.
After the slap, a dazed and embarrassed Rock rubbed his face and screamed, “what ya want? A cookie!” to the audience.
Smith, whose mother was attending the Oscars, immediately yelled out, “That’s it! You’re movin’ with your auntie and uncle to Bel-Air!”
“This isn’t my fault! You know how I get when guys start making trouble in my neighborhood!” Smith yelled back to her. “I get in one little fight, and you guys get scared?”
Unable to compose himself, Smith loudly lamented that he lives in Calabasas and doesn’t want to move fifteen miles east. Most of the audience gasped in horror when he yelled, ‘Smell ya later’ as he stormed out of the award show.
Update: The White House has hired Will Smith to approach the fictional President in a menacing way each time Biden calls for World War III.
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