BROOKLYN, NY–A group of absolutely fabulous homosexuals have launched ‘The 2006 Project’, which asserts that the United States of America actually began shortly after Justin Timberlake’s 2006 hit single “I’m Bringing Sexy Back.”
As expected, Republicans are furious about The 2006 Project and are calling Timberlake’s song ‘dangerous’ and ‘snappy.’
“Mr. Timberlake claims, without evidence, that he alone brought sexy back,” questioned Jim Jordan at a congressional hearing on the matter. “Now that’s funny because I seem to remember Donald Trump doing that dance where he swayed in one place and awkwardly pushes his fists out! Are the history books just going to forget that moment of sexy?”
Also promising to ‘get to the bottom of all this’ is Lindsay Graham.
“Our nation was founded on the idea that sexy shouldn’t be taken anywhere and we demand Justin return it immediately. And just to be safe, he should return it to me personally. At my South Carolina lake house. Say around, 9 pm?”
Update: A massive march promoting The 2006 Project was scheduled to take place in New York Saturday, but the homosexuals accidentally ended up cleaning all the streets instead.
“It’s what Justin would’ve wanted,” they said while scrubbing.
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