WASHINGTON, DC — In what’s considered their best hire yet, the Biden White House has nabbed the guy famous for yanking all the wires out during Forest Gump’s Washington Monument speech.
“This guy was hired to get fistfuls of wires and go-to-town. Every time the president speaks,” an official said. “We’re willing to pay him anything.”
Sure enough, the new hire came in handy when Joe immediately began going off teleprompter during a recent address to the nation. Biden wandered into the following sentence:
“…and speaking about North Korea, when I was a young whippersnapper growing up in Scranton, the homosexuals used to tell me that my leg hair was—“
But no one ever heard what the homosexuals thought of young Biden’s leg hair as sparks flew around the soundboard and the audio was killed.
Several minutes later, once Biden officials believed Joe had finished getting some of the more graphic stories and racial slurs out of his system, they allowed all the wires to be reconnected.
“And that’s all I have to say about that,” the networks clearly heard as Biden shuffled away.
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